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If you read last week’s How to…Funeral, you know I had to attend another funeral. This one was different from the last. It was very “black southern Baptist.” My thoughts were this could good be a really good thing or…a really bad thing. For example, there could be a lot of theatrics which include but are not limited to screaming, throwing one’s self over the casket and yelling “wake up!” Or, a celebration which almost always includes a great choir! Well, it was the later.

Note: If you have not attended a black southern Baptist church, please add it to your bucket list.


The bishop could sing, his wife (an elder of some sort) could sing and the chior was awesome. It was a bit nostalgic for me.

These days, I’m a complete stiff in church. I don’t move, I don’t sing, I don’t clap, I don’t blink, I don’t breathe…


I basically hold my breathe until the services have ended but this choir made me imagine moving a little bit, even clapping. It also really made me miss Baptist churches, they can be entertaining sometimes.

My aunt was quite the staple in the Baptist community, training a lot of people into religious servants. So much so that a host of them introduced themselves during the funeral. I thought it was super formal and kind of unecessary. A handful of them stated “protocol has been established” before proceeding with their condolences. Per research via Google, it’s basically reaffirming that all the HBIC’s of the church have been acknowledged and “I don’t feel like listing all of these people.”

Another thing, a few of them mentioned not telling my aunt goodbye but “goodnight, I’ll see you in the morning.” Without Google, I’m going to use my context clues and assume this means they will see her on the other side.

The preacher was really good, quick (which is highly unusual in the Baptist church) but he lost me when he mentioned Hog Maws in the sermon. I had to Google that as well and trust me, you don’t want to know.

After the service, I realized that most of my grandma’s siblings are heavily involved in the church except for her, her spawns and grandspawns. Even after my aunt poured her heart out to my grandmother about how she can’t get people involved in her church, she then asked my grandmother her role at her church. My grandmother told her she was a “bench member.”

The repast was also good. It was the first time I saw my entire family together since my great grandmother’s funeral in the late 1990s. I even met new family and got the idea that we should have a family reunion opposed to a funeral reunion. Why did I do that? It shouldn’t be too bad since I’ll be employing the assistance of cousins, my little brother and Husband (yes Husband, you read correctly). I’m sure planning and having the family reunion will result in a host of blog posts.

I wish my family healing, I hope it’s made us closer and allowed us to lead better lives. For example, I smiled once this morning. I’m thinking about trying it again in a few days…


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  2. Born and raised in Mississippi and yes in its most rural parts going to funerals is a sport lol! The notion that anyone would want to visit a Black Southern Baptist church for entertainment is completely lost on me mostly because even if I’m not down with religion I still view a church as a sacred space that should be respected. A few weeks ago I met a young man in Cape Town, South Africa and he told me he always wanted to visit New Orleans and a Black Southern Baptist church. I suppose the curiosity is global.

    • Personally, I think part of it is for entertainment purposes. The songs they choose, how they choose to sing it, who acts up the most. However, that can be a way to attract people to the church and get a message to them. I think the entertainment aspect and religion (Christianity) are not mutually exclusive.


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