comment 0


Photo Source: That’s My Topper

Premarital counseling is said to help you get the party marriage started off right.  I had done research prior so I felt like I knew what to expect and was not really looking forward to it…  First, I did not want a pastor to provide counseling.  Yes, I said it.  I did not want to be in a misogynistic counseling session with biblical references.  My fiance has accepted me but I’m not sure if the pastor would if he knew me, for real. So luckily, he recommended that we get counseling from professionals, thank gosh!

We were given two counselors: premarital and financial.  The premarital counselor asked if we had been married before, if we shacked, had kids and our financial situation. We breezed past everything but the finances. The fiance has a master’s degree and I’m still working on my PhD so student debt is nearly impossible to avoid.  She gave us a major side eye but this is not the 1960’s when she was in school, education is expensive.  If you’re sensing shade, you’re correct, lol.  She asked us to outline five expectations we had, to communicate more, and work on individual goals. Interestingly, there are traits he has that I need to adopt and traits I have that he needs to adopt.  We have about three more premarital counseling sessions.


The most beneficial has been financial counseling.  I think this is something everyone should do. DO NOT WAIT.  Your age or status does not matter.  Any who, it was recommended that we go ahead and merge accounts.  Personally, I always thought separate and one joint account was sufficient but our counselor has over 30 years of financial experience so I guess he knows what he’s talking about… Additional homework included starting an emergency fund, getting rid of small debt using the snowball technique and tracking all of our spending.  We’ll work on investing and student loan debt later this summer.  For more information, check out Dave Ramsey. Financial counseling will be an ongoing process so there is no end date in the near future, lol.

Overall, counseling is going well.  We’ve been together over four years so we are aware of our issues. Everyone’s experience may not be a cruise but it’s still worth it; especially, with the current divorce rate… #aintnobodygottimeforthat

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s